JOB SEARCH TECHNIQUES FOR SHY EXECUTIVES
Networking is the most effective job
search technique. But aggressive networking requires someone to be comfortable
in going out and talking with strangers.
Shy people would find networking as
comfortable as eating the working end of a broom. What tactics will work for
them?
According to Dr. Philip Zimbardo of
Stanford University, shyness is defined as a "keen sense of being
rejected...a readiness of avoiding people and situations that hold the
potential for criticism." Based on various surveys of the U.S. population,
it is estimated that approximately 40% of adults would endorse the proposition,
"I consider myself a shy person."
According to Dr. Zimbardo, shy
people tend to think differently than their more extroverted counterparts. Shy
people tend to over utilize generalization as a way of organizing the world. At
the same time, they have a tendency to underutilize situational logic. Examples
of the two types of logic patterns would be:
Two-year-old Jennifer goes with her mother to
visit one of mother's friends. Jennifer is hugging her mother's skirts and
avoiding eye contact with the friend. "I'm sorry but Jennifer is shy"
would be a generalized explanation of the behavior. "I'm sorry but
Jennifer tends to be shy when first meeting strangers. I'm sure she will act
differently once she gets to know you" would be an example of situational
logic.
Ten year old Jimmy is practicing hitting a
baseball. He accidentally shatters the picture window of the living room.
"I'm angry and upset at you...you are a big disappointment to me" would be an example of generalized
logic. "I'm angry and upset that you weren't careful about where you were
hitting the ball" would be an example of situational logic.
As a pattern of thought,
generalization is very helpful to professionals: it allows for the application
of experience from one area to new areas. For example, some lawyers must
develop legal defenses based on generalizing historical judicial
interpretation. This area is one where generalization logic has high value.
Any one pattern of logic, however,
can become dysfunctional when over-employed. A common example of how excessive
generalization logic is used would be the following situation:
A junior executive submits a poorly thought
through recommendation. Situational logic would lead the senior executive to
be sensitive to those environmental circumstances which contributed to the
poor judgment (poor health, death of a
parent, break-up of an important personal relationship, etc). Generalization
logic would accept the inferior recommendation as primary evidence to support
the ultimate conclusion that the executive is incompetent.
In other words, shy people will have
a tendency to employ generalization logic to artificially and sometimes
unfairly pigeonhole others.
But while shy people may unfairly
pigeon-hole people, they don't discriminate. What they do to others, they also
do to themselves! Many shy people would interpret one rejection during
networking as evidence that they can't do it correctly.
If most shy people seek to avoid
situations likely to elicit rejections, then one of those situations most
likely to elicit rebuffs is a job search. Networking puts shy people in the
embarrassing position of having to ask others for favors. It puts them in the
situation of constantly having to face turn-downs.
Over-reliance
on Impersonal Job Search Methods. Many shy people will do all they can to
avoid being put into this uncomfortable situation. This discomfort will
sometimes result in shy job seekers over utilizing impersonal job search
techniques that are likely to have relatively low payoff.
Examples of these more
impersonal/less effective job search techniques would be responding to
classified ads, using recruiters, returning to the school placement office,
etc.
Instead of trying to force feed
people into a networking-oriented model of job search which is clearly
inappropriate, try to do the less personal techniques first. Only come back to
networking when it is clear that the other, more comfortable avenues, are not
going to work.
We have found, for example, that
aggressive utilization of targeted mail campaigns can be quite effective in
finding positions. For
technical-oriented professionals, we have had some good success with placing "position
wanted" advertisements in key professional publications.
When and if it finally comes time to
engage in networking, some shy people have found value in breaking down
networking into specific behavioral components. Deal with each component
one-at-a-time.
With the help of others, focus on
specific components one-at-a-time through role-play, rehearsal with friends,
and low-key try-outs.
Enclosed is a chart which breaks-down networking into its
component parts.
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INSERT CHART 1 ABOUT HERE
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Over utilization of generalization
logic tends to undercut adaptability in the job search. For example:
A
recruiter tells a non-shy attorney about an opportunity with a law firm that
would require an out‑of‑state relocation. This attorney might
employ situational logic to come up with the following analysis: "the job
interview in itself is worth my time, if only for the interview practice. And
while I am not interested in moving, who knows? Perhaps the firm will have an
opportunity that is too good to pass up. I'll never know unless I try. In any
event, I will accept the opportunity for an interview on its own merits."
The
same recruiter then tells a shy attorney about the same job opening. This
attorney might then utilize generalization logic to come up with the following
analysis: "If I go for the interview, I will probably get a job offer.
Since that firm is located in a smaller town, the offer probably won't be as
lucrative as I would get in my hometown. How can I afford to relocate my family
on the salary they are expecting to pay me? Why would I want to move from this
town? I certainly will not waste my time or theirs! "
Earlier in this article, we noted
that the definition of shyness was sensitivity to rejection. But a job campaign
is essentially a rejection process. Asked for a one sentence definition of a
job search, someone one said:
"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
yes."
To
get to that final "yes," one must travel through a forest of
"no's.
If one is engaged in a rejection
game, try to go for many acceptances. Focus on quantity over quality. To make
an analogy, if a ten year old girl asks her best friend to spend
the
day and gets turned-down, then her rejection rate is 100%. This little girl is
apt to feel quite sad. On the other hand, if the same girl asks six children
over, and gets two acceptances from her best friends, then the rejection rate
is cut down to 66%.
While we try to encourage people to
be open in terms of soliciting offers and exploring possibilities, we totally
agree with shy job seekers that it makes sense to be tough and
critical
in terms of accepting actual offers.
==
Dr.
Laurence J. Stybel and Maryanne Peabody are co-founders of
Stybel,
Peabody Lincolnshire. Its mission is to
assist companies in managing “The Senior Executive Assignment Cycle:” Core
services include retained search for positions that touch the Board, coaching
on the CEO/Board axis, and helping senior executives craft new chapters in
professional lives. There are 114
Lincolnshire offices around the world.
Tel.
617 371 2990
EXHIBIT 1
Networking
Desensitization
On a scale of 1 (hardly any discomfort at all) to 9 (very
uncomfortable...frightening), rate each of the enclosed activities regarding
your comfort level. We will then deal
with each activity in the order of discomfort you have rated and work on the
networking program step-by-step. In
other words, we will not ask you to engage in a higher-rated activity until we
have successfully dealt with the discomfort levels of the lower-rated
activities.
|
Thinking
about listing of contacts. Writing
a list of contacts. Calling
up primary contact on the phone -
a good friend. Calling
up primary contact on the phone -
someone who knows me from work
but not a friend. Leaving
a message with the secretary. |
Explaining to the contact why I am in the job market. Asking
for a meeting. Dealing
with objections raised when the
person states s/he can't see me. Asking
for the names of other
contacts I might talk with. Saying,
I'm not asking for a job..." |